Be Honest--You're Not That Into Him Either: Raise Your Standards and Reach for the Love You Deserve by Ian Kerner Summary and Reviews
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Book Reviews of Be Honest--You're Not That Into Him Either: Raise Your Standards and Reach for the Love You Deserve
Book Review: Book with bad advice
Summary: 2 Stars
To begin with, this book has some good points. For example, women have to leave the "transitional" guy if they want to find what they are looking for. Of course, if you are with a guy, other guys won't approach you because they think you already have a S.O.
Having said this, this book is based on a false premise: that young attractive women (the target readers) have to raise their standards to meet the man of their dreams. This is a very bad advice and I will explain why.
Firstly, young hot women don't need to be asked to raise their standards. They have unreasonable and unrealistic standards in the first place: they want the guy to be handsome, decided, rich, confident, with the right income, with the right car, with the right political ideology. He has to say the right words in the right order, have the right attitude, treat them exactly the way they want. Be sensitive but also an alpha male. And he must be completely right the first time, because, otherwise, there will be no second one. Young hot women dismiss guys based on the most ridicule reasons (for example, their shoes). I could go on and on, but every guy who has tried to approach a young hot woman during the last 20 years knows what I am talking about.
In fact, young hot women are driven by a false perception of abundance. When you have lots of guys trying to talk to you, you can be picky, can't you? No. You can't. As I have said, this is a false perception. 95% of the guys who approach young hot women only want to bang them a couple of times and then move on. And women are usually looking for a relationship. So young hot women don't have as many possibilities as they think.
Between all the guys that try to approach young women, there are a few that are thinking about something more solid than getting laid. But they are quickly dismissed by young women. They are often shy guys or they are not as confident as the ones who are selected by young women. Or maybe they don't have the luxury car. So young hot women end up being "used and left" by the most attractive guys while wondering "where have all the good men gone?"
Of course, young hot women (and everybody) would prefer men who have the right appearance, job, wealth and the right attitude towards commitment, but there is a very short supply of them. This is the problem of this book: that a naive young women can interpret it like "if I raise my standards and leave the transitional guy, I will meet an A+ guy". Well, sometimes this happens but this is like winning the lottery.
So the book is counterproductive. But giving the bad advice: "raise your standards. don't be satisfied with the guys you are with", only produces more heartbreak. The problem are not standards that are too low but standards which are not adequate. Instead of scaring away guys who have the wrong car or words try to scare away guys who have the wrong attitude towards commitment (after all, the car can be replaced and the first words are not that important). Instead of being driven by appearance, try to be driven by reality. It's time to grow up and sort out your priorities in life. There is nobody like Prince Charming (because Prince Charming is a fictitious character) but define what are the main qualities you are looking for in a man and try not to scare away the guys who have these qualities.
So if you buy this book, please separate the wheat from the chaff if you don't want to be forty and single, waiting for this A+ guy which will never appear.
Book Review: Must Buy!!!
Summary: 5 Stars
This is like a another version of He Is Just Not That Into You...but the girls' version...a good book to put past relationships into perspective and even the relationship you are currently in! Must read to stop making the same mistakes and losing years on life with the WRONG person!Book Review: Lost me by page 20
Summary: 1 Stars
I read the book by the other author first "He's just not that into you", and wanted more of the same thing so I bought this book. Not even close. I still have my bookmark between pages 20 and 21 and I bought the book 5 months ago. Not a great read by any means.Book Review: Of Course I'm Not Into Him
Summary: 3 Stars
in-the-meantime guys serve a purpose, which is why they are named that
why would u want to get rid of them waiting on the right man? you'll be so depressed from sittin in the house bored, nobody will want you when you do get out
Book Review: Honesty is the best policy, even if it hurts
Summary: 5 Stars
Sure this book set me into tears quite a few times but that is because I swear it was written about me! Finally someone, a man at that, who totally understands and can explain how women and men feel about sex and relationships. It's brutally honest but you will feel better about yourself and the choices you've made by the end of the book. The "other" book shoots down your self confidence and this one boosts it. A wonderful must read for single girls.