Be Honest--You're Not That Into Him Either: Raise Your Standards and Reach for the Love You Deserve by Ian Kerner Summary and Reviews
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Book Reviews of Be Honest--You're Not That Into Him Either: Raise Your Standards and Reach for the Love You Deserve
Book Review: I Couldn't Put it Down!!
Summary: 5 Stars
After reading the "other" book, "He's just not that into you"; I found Ian Kerner's book and I just couldn't put it down! I read it every moment of my spare time. The "other" book was such an in-your-face-shock-advice style of writing; but this book helped me understand why I do some of the things I do with men and dating, without bringing me to tears. His style of writing and getting his point across held my attention on every page. Both books are a must-read, but this book is a MUST-HAVE!Book Review: I'm so into Me!
Summary: 4 Stars
Thanks Ian for talking straight, but not shoving it down our throats. Tough love smothers, inspiration liberates. The truth is he wasn't that into me, and I was heavily into him, but in the end I'm really into me!Book Review: A companion to the Modern Girls Guide to Life
Summary: 5 Stars
I'm a big fan of Jane Buckingham's book Modern Girls Guide to Life which I TOTALLY reccommend to any single going it alone in the city or the burbs and I saw that she blurbed this book, so I checked it out. It is indispensable because it basically assumes you're a smart, thinking person and not some airhead looking for the rules. I just read the review below about how the book focuses too much on sex, and I don't think that's true at all. Sure it deals with sex, because it's a fact of the dating life and sometimes it's hard to balance casual sex and the desire for a real boyfriend, so the sex parts were my favorites. But there was also great stuff on how we give up too easily, or strat believing that there are no good guys out there. This book is definitely for women with a feminist soul who are trying to juggle the desire to be strong, independent women with more traditional goals like getting married. Book Review: horrible horrible horrible!!
Summary: 1 Stars
I wouldn't recommend this book to my worst enemy! IT was stupid, and pointless unless you want to learn more about "servicing yourself". The first half of the book was about nothing except sex and why women masturbate. It assumed that every women does and is just filthy! the author's attempt to make it like the popular "He's just not that into you" failed horrible! At least the other book can go both ways!
I'm regretting ever buying this book and would never ever tell anyone to read it! It was a waste of time!
Book Review: Too one sided
Summary: 3 Stars
This is another wussy man writer, fondling women's ego's with the statement "women are better than men...", "Most men are like rats, women are like voles..."
I believe the glaring problem is that appreaving women with these superficial opinions is a total insult to the female intelligence, and an insult to male behavior. He is judging rather than explaining why things are the way they are.
Let me illustrate... Many years ago, male Rulers would capture as many female concubines as they could to keep for procreation purposes. Many men were left to scavenge for women in the outskirts. Rulers made it law that you must marry, 1 woman in order to "copulate."
Later on...The strength of religion increased greatly. Now these rules, came from the same kind of Rulers. They didn't change but they affirmed monogamy into law using a religious catalyst. (Don't make me scream King James)
The reason I'm touching on this is because I believe Mr. Kerner is judging, rather than being a witness to the process and just communicating observations. I believe his true referential in saying "men are like rats", is due to moral programming received when we was a child. It's easy to label something and never understand it than to walk the path to understanding how it became.
I believe the moral issue is that we label something bad, evil, mysterious, without going any further.
Ladies? Is that going to help you?
It's been done for years, and reinforced by the religious establishment. (Mainly because what a woman seeks to achieve coincides to some religious aspects) "Men are dogs, Men are pigs!" You can continue labeling men, and never understand them. Or you can take the time, to be a WITNESS, and observe the traits so that you can live better.
Evolution rules. Women are the way there are is because it has taken billions of years to achieve these attributes. Every one of them! Men are the way they are because they too, have taken billions of years to evolve.
These behaviors with men and women HAVE A PURPOSE. Because the women who were not like this didn't survive. AND, as importantly, men who don't have these so-called "rat" traits didn't survive.
I hate to tell you what you already know ladies, but ah, you don't like wussy men anyway!! And if you choose one for a husband, you'll have serious issues with him because he WILL NEVER COME TO BAT FOR YOU. (But he'll come to bat for mommy!!)
Ok I can go on all day about this, back to the book...
Mr. Kerner is an educated man. He makes a lot of good points that I have assimilated into my collection of ideas. I would recommend this book to any woman and man willing and able to read it. (As long as they keep that judgment stuff in the back of their skull.)
The books title, along with it's pages are designed with the intent to take disappointed women into a journey with no destination. More or less, I think it's to keep people like him "in the loop." Solving problems doesn't sell books, and solving relationships doesn't keep the man employed.
But don't you want to read the book so that you can solve... a problem? I know Dr John Grey said "Men like to solve problems, women only like to discuss them..."
REALLY?
Do you really want to spend the rest of your life go through loads of mister wrongs? Or do you want to solve this issue, so you can get on to other things that need solving too?
OK, now that I addressed the weak points, I would still recommend it to my sisters, my friends, my cousins, and my neighbors.