Conflict Unraveled: Fixing problems at work and in families
by Andra Medea
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Book Summary Information
Author: Andra MedeaEditor: Robert Logan
Edition: Paperback
Audio: English (Original Language); English (Unknown); English (Published)
Published: 2005-06-15
ISBN: 0974580805
Number of pages: 264
Publisher: PivotPoint Press
Book Reviews of Conflict Unraveled: Fixing problems at work and in families
Book Review: The five star rating is well deserved, with a caveat or two
Summary: 5 Stars
Finally - a book that not only identifies urgent issues, but also outlines how to deal with them. The book is not a magical prescription to cure all of your ills. You will have to supply your own medicine (hard, diligent, consistent work), but it will increase your personal power and probably make your life happier.
We all have people problems, but no handbook regarding how to deal with them. Medea comes as close as anyone ever has to writing a handbook on the art of dealing with the unhappier moments in life involving interaction with other people (conflict). The book is always going back to how you (emphasize YOU) have to change your behavior in order to deal with people more effectively. The reader should be able to instantly recognize that he or she has had many of the experiences and feelings Medea describes in the book - within the past week!
Early in the book Andra lays groudwork describing "stages" of conflict. She lists four stages and only stage one is healthy (luckily we are not often at three or four!). Then, the reader is gently prompted to recognize that due to exogenous or endogenous factors (usually a combination of both), we react to people in a way that creates different stages of conflict. The book covers just enough to prevent boredom or overtechnical analysis, but also gives an ample background for the reader to not only understand interpersonal dynamics, but actually use the information to help resolve conflict and increase productivity in the work place, harmony at home, et cetera.
However, Andra unwittingly creates a conflict of her own with the reader by approaching the topic with a decidedly and undisguised feminist viewpoint. It detracts from the otherwise excellent social science she has done. Conflict is not a men versus women issue; differences between the sexes exist but neither is immune to any type of conflict expressed in any kind of way. It would have been easily possible and preferable not to give one-sided examples that paint women as victims of an oppressive male society. It may have been more constructive to give some opposite examples (a dominant woman screaming at her passive husband...) to grab the reader's attention and make the topic more poignant.
Altogether the book was well written, easy to understand, and uncovered a range of human behaviors that we all practice and probably do not recognize until a book such as 'Conflict Unraveled' comes along. From beginning to end Medea uncovers a range of human behaviors that include adrenaline levels, group dynamics (ladder/cluster type organizations), body language, and verbal communication (direct and indirect misunderstandings). I recommend finding space on your bookshelf for the book. econ
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