Getting to 'I Do' by Pat Allen, Sandra Harmon Summary and Reviews
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Book Reviews of Getting to 'I Do'
Book Review: A book for "players" not honest people
Summary: 1 Stars
I wish I could give this book negative stars. If you are a "player" you will love the book since it certainly describes in detail how to be a manipulative, condescending, controlling person. If you believe in honest, up-front relationships like I do, don't waste your time reading this. One of Dr. Allen's basic premises in the book is to choose to play either the feminine role or the masculine role in the relationship. You can't do both. It's all or nothing. Your partner must play the opposite role that you are. Then, like it or not, that is the role you must adhere to in order to keep the peace. It will involve not being yourself or doing what comes natural to you in many instances, but that is what you must do. This is all so ludicrous in my view. Why not find a person that has a combination of feminine and masculine qualities that you like and are comfortable with and then be yourself in the relationship? Does Dr. Allen really think that playing a role will lead to bliss, rather than building up anxiety and discontent since you aren't being yourself? You are being dishonest by acting in this manner, although she suggests you be true to yourself several times in the book.
One piece of advice that she gives is to dress good, smell good, and act like "you want to get laid" to get the man you want. Then after you get him, start negotiating what it is that you really want. You may give him things, but never, ever as much as he gives you, regardless of how much you would like to. Yes, this is a book for players. It does provide a certain balance for the male player books that are out there, however.
The author strikes me as incredibly self-righteous with comments like "Sperm is cheap; eggs are precious." I did learn, however, that only men have ... performance problems. Her assertion is that every ... dysfunction is a male problem and women don't have such things. Or if they do, it was caused by a man thereby forcing the woman to "be ready to defend myself against your insensitivity, rather than surrender my body to you."
If you want a healthy relationship, don't waste your time reading this...
Book Review: A good Reference Guide To Dating
Summary: 5 Stars
If you truly want to get married, then this book has some necessary info for you. Girls today think it's alright to call the guy &
make the date. Don't do It. Let him pursue you. Why?
Because as a man he wants to do that. It's HIS job. The Millionaire
Matchmaker says that as does Steve Harvey In his book. It's genetics. And don't have sex before monogomy. This Is basically
what the author tells you & much more on men. This Is one
of 3 books I recommend you buy.
Book Review: A must read!
Summary: 5 Stars
Excellent book. I highly recommend it for anyone who's interested in having a successful, intimate romantic relationshipBook Review: A true gem for LIFE!
Summary: 5 Stars
... I now give [this] as a gift to anyone and everyone who whines about dating! I quote Dr. Allen, I love Dr. Allen. ...
Not only is this book good for dating, its good for understanding people period. Who is masculine energy and how to spot them and who is feminine energy and why. Once you explain this simple insight to people they nod and identify everyone around them!
The book has a great quiz to help you identify yourself and then so many outlines of who and what you are and how to find someone to compliment that. People often say but I don't want to give up being me to meet someone. And yet we do it all the times to fit into the right job. Its not so much of giving up yourself as packaging yourself honestly as to who you are and what you truly want.
It really also helps you think and focus on what is important to you in a relationship. From living arrangements to sex this book covers it all and it breaks it down in chunks you can understand. It also covers the honeymoon phase and the imperfect phase and how to know where your relationship is headed. And most importantly HOW to argue. The wonderful thing about the structure is that its balanced. You never feel like you're getting only half the picture and if you're really smart you can simply start reading the book as energy and not apply gender to the pronoun usage.
I also think it gives incredible insights to communication period, its one of the first ways I use to get a feel for a person and learn how to communicate with them. Dr. Allen teaches you an invalubale, life long tool so quickly and simply in what to listen for that you will literally run thru your life calling out who was which energy.
Can you guess which energy I am from this review?
I recommend this book avidly and wholeheartedly as a gift to self and others and the used price is so right to give it as ... gift!
Book Review: Ask your HAPPILY married friends
Summary: 5 Stars
I almost discarded this book without even opening it up, but by the time I finished reading the forward I was completely hooked. I have since suggested it to all of my single girl-friends. Yes, this book will make you angry. Yes, you will read sections of this book and curse out loud. I suggest when you think you can no longer read another word of this book you ask your HAPPILY MARRIED friends if what you are reading has any validity. Ask your friends who have their husbands wrapped around their fingers. They will tell you that their power is not in their good looks, but in knowing when to keep quiet and when to speak up. Men need to be validated. They need to FEEL like men. In this day and time we no longer NEED A MAN, they know this, but we continue to remind them of this fact via our words and our actions. Regardless of the lack of necessity, you want a man or you wouldn't be reading this review. We have to learn how to make men feel WANTED AND NEEDED in the same manner that we want to feel WANTED AND NEEDED. Do yourself a favor SINGLE WOMAN read this book, expect to get PISSED, but KNOW Dr. Allen is only telling you what happily married woman already KNOW.
Lastly, I am a chronically single and DATELESS individual. It is a frustrating reality especially as I approach the BIG 3-0. The FIRST time I tried the 3 second flirt I not only ended up having a 3 hour conversation with a complete stranger, who was very attractive, I got a free meal out of the deal.....true story.