Split: A Memoir of Divorce by Suzanne Finnamore Summary and Reviews
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Book Reviews of Split: A Memoir of Divorce
Book Review: A Familiar Story?
Summary: 5 Stars
Suzanne Finnamore tells a story we've all heard before; her husband deserts her and their young son after a few years of marriage for the charms of another woman. So what makes Ms. Finnamore's account any different from the dozens you've heard in your lifetime? For certain, Finnamore's story is a sad one. However, her therapeutic memoir is loaded with hilarious anecdotes, honed by a sharp wit, which will bring a smile to you face and pain to your heart. Of particular interest is her ability to turn a phrase, create an impactful metaphor or simile and, most importantly, tell a compelling story. As I made my way through "Split," I kept thinking how interesting it would be to read her ex-husband's account of the same situation. Hmmm. Book Review: Brilliant look at divorce and the grieving process
Summary: 5 Stars
In her Anger section (Stage II) she says, "The snag about marriage is, it isn't worth the divorce. My new doctrine is, never marry. I won't ever again. It is absolute swill. It's not just my marriage. It's all marriages except a handful. Marriage is a conspiracy from Tiffany's, florists, the diamond industry, and Christian fundamentalists. The only thing good about it is the diamond ring, the wedding gifts, and the honeymoon. A, (the name she gives her son in the book) I could have gotten anywhere. I could have gotten A from a turkey baster and a lovely gay man with a college education and a pleasant disposition. IF ONLY I'D HAD THAT MUCH SENSE AT THE TIME. I'm sending turkey basters to all my single girlfriends, with holly tassels, for Christmas."
In Bargaining (Stage III) she says, "Sorry is the two-dollar bill of words. It's worth something, but in the end it's ridiculous, a souvenir at best."
Section IV: Grief, she says, "Grief, I understand with icy clarity, is simply information I allow myself to know."
And she says this, when wondering what she might say to her son one day when he asks about divorce: "I will say: 'You enter into - well. You enter into a kind of madness. You will make discoveries, not all of them happy. And the surprises are not staggered or regularly spaced, they are coming at you at light-speed, all at once, and you have to continue. You don't get to stop and say, I'll pick this all up in a year or so, when it isn't so difficult or painful or scary. When I'm ready. No no no. You have to go back in daily, until. Until it passes, or something happens to lessen its dark brilliance. you never know when this will be. You just have to keep meeting it. And gradually it disperses, leaving a small tear in your heart. A little hole, an aperture in you, as in a camera lens which, in the right light, can be perceived and accepted as a perspective-enhancing hole.'"
You don't have to be divorced, almost divorced, thinking about divorce, or even know someone getting divorced, to appreciate this book - it's about grief. And aren't we all grieving something, or someone? Or both?
Book Review: With sadness, a hopefulness
Summary: 5 Stars
In any break-up, especially one precipitted by deception, one would excuse any level of bitterness. Yet, Finnamore manages the difficult balance of anger, humor, hurt and bewilderment. She gives hope to those in the same unfortunate situation.
Plus, I loved imagining the second wife's realization that she snagged a man who will never seemingly stop cheating.
Book Review: Highly Recommended
Summary: 5 Stars
I have read every book on this subject (divorce). Although it came out a bit late in the day (decade) for me - or rather for my own divorce - it still provided still needed succor. Funny and beautifully written and studded with sentences you will want to write down. Highly recommended. Book Review: Beautiful book!
Summary: 5 Stars
I left my husband 25 years ago this month, at his request. The child we shared was biologically only his, so I felt he needed to keep the house - and the law figured he needed to keep our daughter. This book - oh, my, it nails it! Every emotion, all the way! I, too, have been blessed - the child was 11 at the time, and my ex allowed me to have joint custody. Today we share a pleasant friendship, chatting occasionally by phone and enjoying family events together. But all those other chapters - I remember them well, and Finnamore couldn't have described them better!
Which, by the way, is another beauty of this book - her great writing style!
If you've been there, if you're there now...if you want to understand what someone you care about is going through - Split is perfect!