Why Him? Why Her?: Finding Real Love By Understanding Your Personality Type
by Helen Fisher
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Book Summary Information
Author: Helen FisherEdition: Hardcover
Audio: English (Unknown); English (Original Language); English (Published)
Published: 2009-01-20
ISBN: 0805082921
Number of pages: 304
Publisher: Henry Holt and Co.
Book Reviews of Why Him? Why Her?: Finding Real Love By Understanding Your Personality Type
Book Review: A Must Read to Further Understand Yourself and Those You Love
Summary: 5 Stars
[...]
I am a follower of the adage that things happen for a reason despite the laughter of some at my undying optimism and fervor in acknowledging the hands of fate. Such a moment occurred just the other day as I passed through the kitchen only to find Diane Sawyer interviewing Helen Fisher on her theory of finding real love. I honestly believe that the timing of my catching this snippet could not have been more perfect as relationships have continuously intrigued me. So, of course, I ran out and bought Fisher's latest book: Why Him? Why Her: Finding Real Love by Understanding Your Personality Type.
Though I am only in my twenties, I have continuously struggled to break free of categorization. If you put me in a nice little box that says "She is..." or "She isn't..." then I will most likely try my hardest to break those expectations, knock down the walls of that imperfect box and challenge you to expand your view. Knowing this about myself, I could not help but groan a little when I realized Fisher's goal was to categorize individuals into four broad personality types: Explorers, Builders, Directors, and Negotiators. Yet, despite being disgruntled, I gave her the benefit of the doubt, took the quiz (both in the book and online to ensure authentic results), and forged into her discussion. What I discovered was shocking.
As it turns out, there is a one point disparity between my personality types thus making me a Negotiator/Explorer. I am accustomed to self-help books that try desperately to categorize individuals and was pleasantly surprised that Fisher offers a much more plausible option in tearing down those neat categorizes in order to welcome variety. She theorizes that individuals have a share of all four personality types; however, because of our genetic make-up, past experiences, etc. we tend to have a clear primary and secondary type.
I will spare the details on Fisher's complete theory with the hope that people pick up a copy and examine it on their own. As an individual who abhors stereotypes and categorization, this book is a surprising favorite of mine as it not only explains why we choose to love certain individuals, but it also teaches us more about ourselves and those around us whose relationships we are privy to day in and day out. I encourage you to pick up a copy, take the test, and explore Fisher's theory of love. You might be surprised at what you find.
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